chart tending as a devotional practice

Thinking about how any part of a chart can be neglected to the point of fading into oblivion.

Recommitting in my chart analyses, to deeply ruminate on every planet. What each planet needs. If it is getting it.

All the planets, not just the personal, but the social and the transpersonal ones too.

Science and psychology are converging on the truth that we exist only through our relationality - a particle is nothing more than a set of relationships.

A human is a set of relationships. Doesn’t sound like the most absurd thing I’ve heard.

Seeing a chart analysis as a delicate and sacred scan of wholeness. (some of it unpotentiated)

Thinking about the places in my own chart that are revealing their neglect.

Of course we tend to prioritize the parts of ourselves that are the most needy and the most loud. Squeaky wheel gets the grease.

I think in some ways, it feels like there is an amount of redundancy built into the human character - it’s so complex and multitudinous.

There’s so many voices (sub-personalities or, perhaps, more accurate to this post, personality components, or personality modules), it’s understandable why we may not hear every single one.

I’ve never felt my brain this ravenous or this satisfied. My Mercury in Capricorn has been…neglected.

My mind has been starving for a mountain to climb. And now that it has one, there are feelings. I feel overjoyed at this, this now, this mountain, this climbing, this exertion, this exhilaration, this delight in mulling over problems, over ideas, of putting my mind to work. My mind has craved work. A specific kind of work. The right mountain.

I feel grief at knowing that for so long it - this specific need of my mind, that is - was not tended to, and I was ignorant about it.

And I feel heartbreak that despite not being fed, this part of me held on, and refused to die.

There are parts of ourselves waiting to be fed, and refusing to die, stalwart in maintaining our wholeness, even as we deny them (perhaps completely unwittingly, as was my case).

These parts, despite their insistence on existence, may not be easy to smoke out. (ironically)

This is why returning to the chart is a devotional practice. Returning again and again, there is always something new to discover, a greater wholeness to step into. We are never done.

The chart is a map that keeps shifting. Relativity and parallax are the astronomical concepts that come to mind.

As long as we keep moving, so does what the chart shows us and what the chart looks like.